I have to this a topic I have asked myself many times. When do we have enough with the drama in our life, and the many things that upset. But more and more I find myself asking when is enough pysical pain to much for body to bare anymore!! My list of medical ailments could be a resume it so long. In the last couple of months we have added about three more things on to it. I do believe that in God all things are possible and that HE does give us the knowlege to know when we need to see a doctor or when we need help of any kind. That being said I have to ask if HE gives that ability how could I not believe he would gives this ability and knowledge to know when enough is enough for our bodies!!
It would seem like anymore more days then not I am in pain and at least one day out of the week the pain is so unbearable that I can't even sit up! The doctors are all trying to get under control but fix one thing seems to aggervate another. I am now having mini-strokes and was told at anytime I could have a major stroke and was give the signs to look for, it seems like it is to much to process anymore. I seemed overwhelmed just with all the information given to me.
Then my family, having to watch them watch me like this is such a horrible feeling. I can not fix this for them I have no way of easing their worry anymore. My boys are saying momma we will take care of you and as much as that makes me feel good it makes me feel terrible. Ten, nine, and six yearsl old should not be taking care of me I am suppose to be taking care of them. But most days that is not possible, not without lots help.
So, this brings me back to my question is not possible to think with all the knowledge HE gives us, HE would also give us the knowledge to know when ENOUGH is ENOUGH!!
First of all, Steph, I am glad to see you writing and bringing to light your thoughts and feelings. And to read your confession of faith in Jesus during this dark time and your thankful heart to Him in all things reveals His work in you and your deep and abiding love for Him.
ReplyDeleteYou have asked a question that no one can answer for you... except Jesus. As you were talking about knowledge, two scriptures about wisdom came to mind.
"For this reason also since the day we heard of it, we have not ceased to pray for you and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding," Colossians 1:9
"But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all men generously and without reproach, and it will be given him." James 1:4
Stephanie, your thoughts and feelings are valid and come from a loving heart. I wish I could think of something to say to make you feel better. "I love You" ...and I do love you... seems puny on a day like today.
But I can hold you up to the One who loves you more and the One who sees the whole of what we only see a part of. Today...I pray for you the peace of God from the God of peace and I pray He will strenghen you and Billy and the boys and will cause Great Grace and Mercy to abound to you.
Bobbie